love – Page 2

What do you see in the mirror?

By Staci McLean on Tuesday, August 11, 2020

On my dressing table I have a small standalone mirror. It has lights around the edges and one side is a normal mirror and the other side is a magnifying mirror. The normal side is good, the lights make it easier to put on my makeup but if by mistake I flip it over and catch a glimpse at my magnified image, it is shocking. Every bump, spot or wrinkle is enlarged and amplified. When I first discovered the magnified side of the mirror, I started obsessing about all my ‘flaws’ on my face and wondering how to fix them. Until I realised that no one ever looks at my face that closely or with a magnifying glass and those ‘flaws’ were nothing more than normal skin and normal aging. The magnification gave me an altered reality. It is true in life as well, what we focus on and magnify in our minds can become more significant to us whether it is real or not.

When you look in the mirror or think about your character and who you are as a person, do you focus only on your faults and what needs to be ‘fixed’ or can you see your beauty and all the amazing qualities you have.

A mirror can only reflect what is standing in front of it. We interpret the image and make conclusions and judgements about what we see. A mirror does not say you are ugly or worthless, you tell yourself that. Neither does the mirror tell you that you are acceptable and confident; your personality will reflect that inner belief.

Holding up a magnifying glass can make you see flaws that are not even there or make you obsess and have an unhealthy fixation on yourself. Spending too much time and energy focused on yourself and judging yourself harshly is unproductive and destroys self-esteem. It leads you away from freedom and from being who God created you to be and away from your purpose. Rather learn to see yourself as God sees you, a work in progress but loved and accepted.

“Every time you look in the mirror remember that God created you and that everything He creates is beautiful and good!”
Joyce Meyer

Confidence and Self esteem Faith Inspiration

Until next week…

By Staci McLean on Wednesday, August 5, 2020

Remember in the ‘old’ days when you watched your favourite TV program and then had to wait a whole week for the next episode, it was torture. But the anticipation and the discussions and dissection of the episode with friends was the highlight of the week and when the following week rolled around, it was as exciting as Christmas morning as the familiar theme song played once again.

The introduction of ‘on demand’ entertainment has changed all this. I am not opposed to streaming at all, in fact I am a big fan and love the access to such a huge and wide range of options but when I explain to my kids about the ‘old’ days of TV and watching one episode per week they look back at me blankly and I wonder if they are missing out on a valuable experience.

With such a over indulgent culture when entertainment is endless, we have food delivered to the door and at a click of the mouse we can order just about anything and it will arrive in the few days are we becoming immune to the blessing of waiting.

When we think about waiting and patience it is often in terms of struggle or pain or disappointment. We do not want to wait for the things we want or need, we want action, we want results. However, we forget about the other side of waiting, the excitement building, anticipation, suspense, expectancy, hope, butterflies in your stomach. Even waiting can be a wonderful experience when looked at with different eyes.

The Bible is filled with people waiting. Abraham waited for a child, Jacob waited for Rachel, Moses waited in the wilderness, David waited to be King, the Disciples waited for the Holy Spirit and even Jesus waited for the right time to start his mission. So why do we get so impatient and think we should not have to wait too?

Waiting is a fact of life; we all experience it. In your future you will have to wait, you will wait for things to happen, for other people, for traffic and appointments, for God to answer prayers and for time to pass. But we all get a choice on how we spend that waiting time. Use your waiting time to be joyful, to be excited about what comes next, to be a blessing to others who might be waiting with you, to connect with God for strength and wisdom when it gets tough, appreciate the present moment and be grateful.

“Patience is not the ability to wait but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting.” Joyce Meyer

Addiction recovery Confidence and Self esteem Inspiration

Do you know how much you are loved?

By Staci McLean on Thursday, July 23, 2020

Recently I went to a funeral of a very dear friend. She was a kind and caring person, who would help anyone, but she struggled with low self-esteem and confidence and she found it difficult to accept that she was loved by her friends and family or by God.

As I sat in her funeral listening to the people who loved her dearly, speak about the incredible sense of loss they felt, I just wished she could have understood how much she was loved. The room was overflowing with people who were all impacted by her life and by her passing.

Had she been there sitting next to me, seeing what I was seeing and hearing the words of speakers, reading the messages of condolences and the tributes, I think she would have been overwhelmed. So many people loved her, and God loves her even more. I wish she had understood that when she was alive.

But do any of us really know and accept how much we are loved?

Do we live our lives every day knowing deep down in our hearts that we are loved, accepted, and cherished by our family and friends?

Do we really understand how much God loves us?

Our lives have the potential to be quite different if we can totally comprehend this love. If you knew you were loved unconditionally and completely, would you be fearful? Would you feel insecure and unworthy? Would you be broken? Would you feel alone or abandoned? No. When we understand how much we are loved, we are confident, brave, courageous, loving, selfless, joyful, and strong.

Human love can be messy and complicated, but God’s love is not. God is love. God’s love for us is complete, merciful, and perfect. I love the song, ‘Reckless Love’ by Cory Asbury. The chorus captures this picture of the love of God so well.

The overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God. It chases me down, fights ’til I’m found, leaves the ninety-nine
I couldn’t earn it, and I don’t deserve it, still, You give Yourself away
Oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God

God’s love is reckless. He gave it all for us. He chases us and fights for us, we do not deserve it and we can never do enough to earn it, but He gives us freedom, healing, and salvation through Jesus. Jesus – the ultimate gift of love.

Know this, let it sink into your spirit and every cell of your body and mind. You are loved and you are cherished by God. He wants to know you. He wants to cover you with love. He wants you to understand and feels His love and then live your life bathed in His love, serving and loving others.

Confidence and Self esteem

Bad Hair Day?

By Staci McLean on Wednesday, July 8, 2020

Is your confidence dependent on your appearance?

Yesterday I saw an advert on Facebook it went something like this, are you shy or depressed, do you feel bad about yourself and unhappy with your life, do you want to be happy and have confidence and have an amazing fun life? Then click here…

The answer to all these problems according to this advert was weight loss. If you use their product to lose weight you will be confident and happy.

I have a big problem with this. Firstly, the assumption that if you are overweight you must be depressed, unhappy, timid and have a miserable life. Secondly, that looking good and slim will make you confident.

We are bombarded with messages that tell us we cannot be confident unless we look a certain way and if we don’t, we should be ashamed and disappointed. To feel confident, you must be (or appear to be) young, slim and beautiful. Therefore, the reason you are unhappy or shy is your appearance, so change it.

The answer we are told is to buy this weight loss product, or shapewear or contouring makeup or creams and serums or jeans that suck your tummy in or have plastic surgery. All this is driven by a multimillion-dollar industry, who profit from making you feel insecure and ashamed.

There is nothing wrong with looking after your body, your health and losing weight is you need to. Nor is there anything wrong with dressing nicely or getting your hair done or taking care of your skin. The problem is in where are you getting your confidence from and the damaging lies that you are believing. Why can’t you be confident, assertive and capable just the way you are now? Does your confidence come from what you look like or from who you are as a person?

Recently I watched a plastic surgery program about a woman who had a nose job that did not go as she expected and she thought she had been botched. To me it looked fine and I would not have even noticed it if it had not been pointed out in the TV program. She was so embarrassed about her ‘ugly’ nose she did not go out, never took her kids to the park and never went out to dinner with her husband. She was convinced everyone was staring at her ‘deformed’ nose. Her confidence and self esteem was destroyed. In the show her nose was ‘fixed’ and of course she was happy again, but the episode left me feeling disillusioned. How sad it was that this woman’s whole self-worth was tied up in her appearance and without a ‘perfect’ nose she felt useless, ashamed and not worthy of enjoying her life. Her nose is only a fraction of her physical body and no part of her character and personality, yet carried ALL the weight of her confidence.

She is not alone or unusual, many of us focus on one small area of our appearance and let it control how we feel about ourselves. How we feel about ourselves influences our careers, our relationships, our choices, our happiness and our future. Our body parts do not determine our value. My jiggly tummy just makes me a person with jiggly tummy not a bad person unworthy of love or a good life.

Be critical of the messages you encounter through the media, social media and in advertising. Know your worth and your value is not from your appearance but from God who loves you and deems you worthy. Focus more on your character and being a better person than on your outside appearance and you will be truly confident and happier.

“The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7

Power words

Beauty

By Staci McLean on Friday, June 26, 2020

Beauty, there are so many ideas about what makes something beautiful, such as beauty is the eye of the beholder, beauty is self-confidence, beauty comes from the heart, beauty is a face covered in makeup, beauty is a natural face, beauty is our imperfections, beauty is a certain body shape, beauty is a glow.

No wonder some many of us struggle to feel beautiful. Beauty by human definition is ever changing and is heavily reliant on trends so completely unreliable. It is a socially constructed ideal that does not exist. Something that is considered beautiful today might not be next year, so do not peg your feelings about your own beauty on that.

Instead real beauty, is in all of creation because it is the reflection of the creator. Beauty is pleasing and delights. We are all beautiful, because God created us and He delights in us and loves us. God created nature, so spectacular, stunning and beautiful, much more than necessary because it delights and gives joy and that same creator made you and me, beautiful in his sight and beloved.

Rethink your idea of beauty and instead see yourself as the beauty God sees you to be.

So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.
Genesis 1:27

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